STREWING is the topic! Think of misconceptions or problems with strewing. If we can see what can go wrong, we can avoid that and only strew the good and happy way! Think of ways to describe it to newer unschoolers to help them avoid confusion.
______________________________
Sandra Dodd: Today's chat is about strewing!
Jill Parmer joined the chat 6 days ago
Marta Venturini: Great topic
Sylvia Woodman joined the chat 6 days ago
Sylvia Woodman: Hello!
Chelsea: Hiya
Sandra Dodd: Is this Chelsea Artisan or another Chelsea?
Chelsea: Chelsea Artisan 
Sandra Dodd: I hope your advanced state of impending even-more-motherhood is going okay.
Maria joined the chat 6 days ago
Chelsea: Thanks! Yeah, I'm getting a bit uncomfortably crowded, but other than that smooth sailing.
Chelsea: I have all my homebirth stuff, everything's washed, the car seat is installed, and hopefully the baby will come out sometime in the next couple weeks!
AlexP joined the chat 6 days ago
Sylvia Woodman: Hi Alex! Oh Maria! So glad to see you here!
AlexP: fun Chelsea~!
Sandra Dodd: You guys want to propose a topic for next week now?
Sandra Dodd: There's a half possibility that I won't be here on the 31st, but next week I will be.
AlexP: Thanks Marta for messaging me. i got distracted sitting with Gigi while just surfing the net. Cuddly girl!
Sandra Dodd: (And the 31st I might be. I'll know in a few days)
Sandra Dodd: Any of you have an "I wish..." about chat topics?
AlexP: keeping the connection at every age
AlexP: Because it looks very different at different ages
Sandra Dodd: Jill, what brand of sewing machine do you have?
Jill Parmer: Juki and Bernina.
Sandra Dodd: The reason I'm asking is for another of those mental analogies that help me (and that I hope don't hurt anyone else).
Jill Parmer: Juki is straight stitch almost industrial machine; Bernina is a basic machine.
AlexP: helping kids navigate socially
Sandra Dodd: I have another cheap Singer. Probably the fifth, over my life. This one I bought for Holly and she wasn't so interested.
Sandra Dodd: I always figured I'd get a Berninina "when I grew up." Now I'm too old to invest in a better machine. 
Sandra Dodd: But that's not the analogy...
Sandra Dodd: I have another question someone wants asked anonymously, and it's been in the messages for over a week but I only saw it today.
Marta Venturini: I like that topic - helping kids navigate socially - Alex.
Sandra Dodd: It's about wanting to persuade a dad figure (not married; don't know if he's baby-daddy) to unschool, when he has no interest.
Sandra Dodd: It's hard.
Sandra Dodd: I don't want to help, in a way.
Jill Parmer: Berninas are expensive because of name, I'd get a different one next time.
Sandra Dodd: But what kind of sense does it make to discourage someone from unschooling
Sandra Dodd: ?
Sandra Dodd: But I don't want to contribute to estrangement or break-up.
Chelsea: I could definitely use ideas on helping kids navigate socially!
Sandra Dodd: So I just kind of wish people woulddn't even ask.
Amber: I could use ideas on helping ME navigate socially
Chelsea: Ha! Same here.
Sandra Dodd: Okay. Those topics can be combined a bit.
Sandra Dodd: Attachment/relationship/social-coach
Marta Venturini: Serah! Hi! You made it today. Yay! 
Jill Parmer: I'm not following, Sandra. How is encouraging or discouraging this father to unschool contributing to staying together or not?
Jill Parmer: (I know generally, just not in the situation you've described.)
Sandra Dodd: He doesn't want to consider it. She wants emperical proof/research to persuade him with.
AlexP: Brian had some doubts. Meeting other unschooling dad,s that he liked helped a lot.
Sandra Dodd: I will put the question out, later, when I get time. It's a long one.
Serah joined the chat 6 days ago
Serah: hi!
Sylvia Woodman: The only empirical proof there is really ever going to be is their own children.
Sandra Dodd: I don't think that's quite true, Sylvia.
Sylvia Woodman: My parents were super skeptical of breastfeeding with Gabriella was born. They thought it was stupid.
Sandra Dodd: Somewhere between none and "there is research" is the "right answer."
AlexP: Oh when one does not even want to consider that is a pretty strong statement
Sandra Dodd: "Empirical" isn't going to apply in any case, but there's not "research" to prove "success."
Sylvia Woodman: But after about 4 months and they saw how happy and healthy she was they suddenly started noticing studies and articles that supported the idea that breastfeeding was a good idea for a baby.
Sandra Dodd: There IS logical evidence that schools produce failures.
Sandra Dodd: I will contribute that to the conversation, when it's going.
AlexP: so one from startng the chat on strewing?
Sandra Dodd: But Jill sews really well because she wants to. She has invested time and money and has a couple of higher-level machines, not the basic $125 plastic American machine you can get at Walmart
Sandra Dodd: Right, we have 10 people. Give me another few minutes.
Jill Parmer: I'll think about it more, but for now, I think the mom needs to learn it and understand it better to help her husband/baby daddy to agree. Maybe start with some principles: being kind and helpful to her child and partner, looking at learning in all places, being sensitive to 'the little boy' in her husband.
Sandra Dodd: So IF Jill were running chats and a forum about how great it is to sew and you can make shirts with collars and plackets (which she does, which I have only done twice with difficulty and no joy), and all...
Sandra Dodd: If someone came and said her husband didn't want her to sew, how could she persuade him? It would be crazy question.
Lindsey joined the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: Somehow what we're doing is turned into something like life and death by some people. I guess because it involves the emotion of motherhood.
Jill Parmer: Wowzer, looking at it that way, just twisted my mind.
Sandra Dodd: And the fears that fathers have about not shepherding their children (boys, especially) toward career opportunities.
Sandra Dodd: So if I went to Jill and whined that I only have a Singer, and that I can't afford expensive cloth, and I don't want to really get nice scissors, but how can I do what she's doing, I would be being an irritant.
Sandra Dodd: But this is something different, with unschooling.
Sandra Dodd: Sylvia, what about breastfeeding discussions? When someone comes with a legitimate inability, or with excuses, do you feel good that you've offered materials and an opportunity? Is that enough?
Sandra Dodd: I don't want to NOT discuss it enthusiastically with people who can do it and want to and are doing it.
Sandra Dodd: But I don't want to feel guilty about people who can't, aren't, won't.
Sandra Dodd: And I sure as hell don't want to contribute to marital (or unmarried domestic) strife and separation.
Sandra Dodd: So I feel a little trapped.
Serah: that's a very clear way of looking at this situation.
Sandra Dodd: What's the insurance-business term for a swimming pool or dangerous thing that must be fenced and locked so other people don't come in and get hurt? I feel like happy unschooling discussions might be like that.
Sandra Dodd: "an attractive nuisance."
Jill Parmer: Sandra, have you heard from both people, or just the mom?
Sylvia Woodman: Breastfeeding is different. There can be partial breastfeeding. There really can't be partial unschooling.
Sylvia Woodman: But, if the dad is not supportive of breast feeding, sometimes we can convince him to try it for 6 weeks or 3 months and then see how he feels about it.
Sylvia Woodman: And in that situation we provide lots of evidence based research to back up the benefits to both the mom and the baby.
Sandra Dodd: Just the mom. I really don't like hearing from both people, EVER—not in a discussion, and sure as heck not by message or e-mail.
Amber: I remember reading something, probably on Sandra's site, that explained how unschooling is even harder in a divorced home, and therefore it's important to honor one's spouse's feelings and concerns. I found that perspective useful. But, my husband is relatively open minded.
Sandra Dodd: I would want a LOT of money to do that (and I wouldn't want to do it)
Sandra Dodd: http://realestate.findlaw.com/owning-a-h...
Sandra Dodd: Quoting.... you don't need to look but I want the link here.
Sandra Dodd: If your property contains items that both draw children in and threaten them with harm, the law places a special responsibility on you to take steps to protect the children who may come onto your property. This duty is generally called the "attractive nuisance" doctrine. Typically, the attractive nuisance doctrine has three components: - See more at: http://realestate.findlaw.com/owning-a-h...
Sandra Dodd: What are some typical attractive nuisances? Typical attractive nuisances include: Swimming pools and fountains Machinery (lawnmowers, gasoline pumps, etc) Wells and tunnels Dangerous animals Paths and stairs - See more at: http://realestate.findlaw.com/owning-a-h...
Sandra Dodd: Well... It's a weird dilemma.
Sandra Dodd: We can go to the topic.
Sandra Dodd: Thanks.
Jill Parmer: Right. And you're going by the mom's words, so you have no idea what discussion really happened between her and her husband. So... she could learn and bring some principles into the home.
Sandra Dodd: -=-that explained how unschooling is even harder in a divorced home-=-
Sandra Dodd: -=-that explained how unschooling is even harder in a divorced home-=-
Sandra Dodd: never say "harder."
Sandra Dodd: I say "usually impossible."
Amber: sorry - my bad paraphrasing
Sandra Dodd: Meant to say "I never say 'harder'."
Jill Parmer: I think when people write to ou, they are often in that stressed/heightened problem.
Sandra Dodd: So!! Welcome to the chat on strewing.
Sandra Dodd: (True, Jill.)
Chelsea: Woo, strewing!
Sandra Dodd: Strewing came out of a phrase I used when strutured homeschoolers were asking me years ago about unschooling.
Jill Parmer: Trampolines.
Serah: strewing is something i feel I dont do enough of
Sandra Dodd: People who couldn't imagine how learning could happen without lessons and a curriculum asked how my kids learned things and I said that I strew their paths with interesting things.
Jill Parmer: Yes. Let's get to strewing. (I'm sorry people write to you directly, instead of reading all the cool stuff on your site, or use Always Learning or Radical Unschooling Ingo.
Jill Parmer: *Info
Sandra Dodd: They were little kids then. It was pretty easy to put out a new toy or puzzle or interesting rock or pine cone
Sandra Dodd: So how about you guys think of times when something was discovered that led to excitement, learning, experimentation, questions, "exposition" (them telling someone else about the thing/experience).
AlexP: I bring cool things in the house ! My mom did a lot of that. Sandra has seen a few interesting bird nests I have found .
Chelsea: I love the example of putting things out for company to fiddle with. I always think of it when we're about to have a party, how do I maximize enjoyment for as many people as possible in the space we have? It's kind of like game level design, in a way. You want to subtly encourage the player to move in a certain direction and notice/interact with certain things in the level.
Sandra Dodd: Holly cut my hair last week, outside, and left it in a raised flower bed. I said "I hope to see that in some birds' nests next winter."
AlexP: I love to bring new books, games and more.
Sandra Dodd: Nice, Chelsea.
Sylvia Woodman: I've been strewing different kinds of music with the Pandora app on my phone. I have some speakers in the kitchen to hook them up.
Sylvia Woodman: Today, of course, it's Irish music.
Sandra Dodd: When coffee tables first came into use in homes as standard furniture, the "right way" to have a coffee table was a few magazines and a "conversation piece."
Marta Venturini:
Sandra Dodd: Some people still do that.
Parvine joined the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: Five magazines, fanned out and a big shell or a bowl of weird seed pods or something
Sandra Dodd: If people were over for coffee, all that was moved. Some tables had a shelf below for such things, between times.
Chelsea: We had a red rope we were using as a zipline in the backyard for a while. Now it's disintegrated and I saw it in a nest in a tree in the neighbor's front yard just the other day!
Parvine: I love strewing new food too, such as exotic fruits or something found while out shopping.
Sandra Dodd: I just love finding identifiable pieces of hair, yarn, string, in nests.
AlexP: We love to scatter hair out for the birds!! That little bird nest I have is made with a lot of our late Pony Honey hair I am pretty sure!
Serah: these are all great ideas. I need to try to do more of all of this
Marta Venturini: Sweet, Alex.
Jill Parmer: I leave my husky's hair out for birds.
Marta Venturini: You'll be traveling a lot this year, Serah (and so will we), so a lot of new things will come into your lives. Food, places, people, and more!
Food, places, people, and more! Jill Parmer: About strewing, when I see something interesting out the window or in the yard or neighborhood, I would call the kids to see. Now they do that for me too.
Serah: true!!
Marta Venturini:
Sandra Dodd: New music, or a video—without saying "come and look!," just putting it on, and if nobody notices, it was just for me. That's happened many times, but more often than not, someone else noticed, asked, watched or listened.
Parvine: Jill that happens with us too but did not think of it as strewing before! Spontaneous sharing of things that catch our attention.
Spontaneous sharing of things that catch our attention.Chelsea: A couple months ago there was a bunch of alphabet talk on Radical Unschooling Info and I realized that although we had lots of letters, we didn't actually have the alphabet up in order anywhere so I stuck some die cut letters on the wall and I was surprised how much Finn (he's five) interacted with it immediately. He wanted to sing the song and count the letters and name them in reverse order.
Sandra Dodd: I don't think of that as strewing either, Parvine.
Jill Parmer: Yeah, perhaps that is not the true definition of strewing.
Sandra Dodd: But I can see the extrapolation / extension of the idea of sharing observations.
Sandra Dodd: It's a related emotion. "This is interesting (or wonderful)."
Sandra Dodd: Someone recently used the example of a library putting out new books on a shelf near the front.
Sandra Dodd: Like that.
Sandra Dodd: When I was a kid, it was the paper dust covers the library would put up so we would see what was new.
Robin B. joined the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: I object to "strewing" books, for anyone who hasn't been unschooling for several years.
Marta Venturini: Something similar happened with us, Chelsea! Inspired by that discussion, I printed out a cute Minecraft-themed alphabet and Conchinha loved it. She sang the alphabet song in Portuguese, then in English sometimes, all day long.
and Conchinha loved it. She sang the alphabet song in Portuguese, then in English sometimes, all day long.Sandra Dodd: It doesn't help with deschooling.
Amber: Is it possible to "strew" an experience, then?
Sandra Dodd: But because libraries are free, they put those new books out, and it's like they're doing you a favor.
Sandra Dodd: But in a store, a display of new things is sometimes seen as evil corporate greed or manipulation. Think about those kinds of things in your spare time.
Sandra Dodd: People have prejudices and fears and oddities.
Serah: my daughter (2) has discovered that she can pull a chair to the sink and play with the tap
Sylvia Woodman: One time when I was in the dollar store I found cardboard coasters that looked like the layers of a sandwich. Bread, lettuce, tomato, onion etc. I brought those home and fanned them out on the table and waited for the kids to notice them.
Sandra Dodd: Amber, it's not so much strewing, then, but it's helpful to do new and different things so the kids have opportunities to know more.
Sandra Dodd: Going to new stores, driving different routes, going to cafes or restaurants or fast-food places they haven't been to, sometimes.
Sandra Dodd: Not always.
Sandra Dodd: New is good sometimes. Routine/families is good sometimes.
Sandra Dodd: d: All of one or the other isn't ideal.
Sandra Dodd: Sometimes unschoolers criticize strewing as being manipulative or coercive.
Sandra Dodd: It never fails to piss me off.
Sylvia Woodman: There is a fruit and vegetable store nearby that stocks a lot of international products. A lot of Polish cookies, and Mexican and Central American products. Sometimes if I run in there to buy some fruit I also get something different to surprise the kids.
Chelsea: Toy rotation could be related to strewing. Pulling out and prominently displaying things that haven't been played with in a while.
Sandra Dodd: Their attitude and motivations aren't "what can I do to help my child learn joyfully and painlessly?"
cat joined the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: It's more like "I don't HAVE to to that," and "How can I one-up Sandra?" and "I'm going to be so non-coercive to piss off my mom and grandmother."
Sylvia Woodman: The store usually has these: http://www.amazon.com/Kinder-Happy-Hippo...
Sandra Dodd: There's a kind of personal-politics and negativity I'm not interested in.
cat: hi everyone its 5am in australia i waslying awake worrying a bit about how we're doing at home when i rembered the chat was on!
Sandra Dodd: Glad you found us, Cat.
Chelsea: I've been wanting to dump out all our toy boxes and sort the toys and make them easier to get to and play with, pretty sure it's a late pregnancy/nesting thing.
Chelsea: Hi Jacquie! <3 and="" are.="" don="" here="" i="" if="" know="" lindsey="" p="" sarah="" still="" t="" they="" were="">
Robin B.: ~ Sometimes unschoolers criticize strewing as being manipulative or coercive. ~
Sylvia Woodman: ==-==my daughter (2) has discovered that she can pull a chair to the sink and play with the tap==-== Do you think she might like something like this? http://www.amazon.com/Dreamfarm-Tapi-Fou...
Robin B.: Only if the parent has an attachment to the outcome, I think.
Sandra Dodd: Toy rotation for sure. Something new a child hasn't seen is great. And even baby toys will be played with by older kids, in ways they didn't / couldn't have before.
Robin B.: Strewing is "if you pick it up or like it, great! If you don't, great!"
Serah: that is too cool, Sylvia! how did you find it? jus t by me posting about my daughter?
Robin B.: I think strewing is a wonderful and thoughtful experience, too, for parents. I started looking for cool things that interested me, as well.
cat: i used to do a lot of toy rotation and offering/strewing but feel a bit lot now as both my children are playin less with toys - what/how to strew now? Cosmo is 6 and mostly watching game walkthroughs with some playing of online games and Thiango is 11 and watching a lot of vloggers. I think i need to change it up - what I'm strewing - so looking for ideas. Today I put out a favourite game we used to play a lot and Thiango said 'mum wants us to stop doing what we're doing and play the monster game' that didn't feel good!
Robin B.: I'm kind of a crow, picking up shiny things.
Marta Venturini: Facebook helps me a lot. So many good ideas. So many cute and fun things to share.
Chelsea: Yeah, since we got a bunch of baby toys out of the garage Finn has been having a lot of fun with them!
AlexP: I like that Robin !! A crow!
Robin B.: ~ Today I put out a favourite game we used to play a lot and Thiango said 'mum wants us to stop doing what we're doing and play the monster game' that didn't feel good! ~
JacquieHarakis left this message 6 days ago:
Oh hello! Took me a while to work out how to post! Interesting conversation, can I read after it's all done? trying to catch up.
Robin B.: cat, it sounds like Thiango thought there was an ulterior motive on your part.
AlexP: yes you can or go to the right hand side and click review mode to catch up now and then back to chat
AlexP: Jacquie click join the chat
Robin B.: ~ I think i need to change it up - what I'm strewing - so looking for ideas. ~ Are you hoping they'll stop playing games and watching vloggers?
cat: hmm - maybe!
AlexP: toy rotation is not strewing.
Robin B.: Then it's not strewing.
Sandra Dodd: Jacquie, click on "join the chat" at the bottom.
Sandra Dodd: Click on "Save/Print" or Review mode, to read it without it jumping around.
Sandra Dodd: It will be here for a few days afterwards, and then saved elsewhere. You'll be able to read it.
AlexP: Putting out the favorite game is not really strewing
cat: ok . . .
Robin B.: Strewing loses its sparkliness if there's an outcome expected.
AlexP: Sandra you can also click the Review mode to read back
Sandra Dodd: Rearranging games is one things. Setting one up on the table and looking hopeful, but not saying "You guys want to play a game with me?" would irritate most huans, I htink.
Sandra Dodd: Alex, I said that.
JacquieHarakis left this message 6 days ago:
Aaah, great, thank you.
cat: yes perhaps i'm thinking about strewing as a way to create variation
Amber: My understanding is, the ideal is to find and leave out both things that you really truly think they would like, like related to current interests, *and* things that are totally new and unrelated to what they already know and like? And be unattached to whether they get into it either way
Robin B.: Variation being good in your mind, cat.
Sandra Dodd: Save/print shows more of it. And at the top of save/print it will say 1 of 2 or 2 of 2.
cat: yep
Sandra Dodd: To get back to 1 of 2, just physically change the 2 to a 1
AlexP: Bringing in a new game and leaving out . Find an interesting book about something and leave in the bathroom,
Robin B.: This ~ And be unattached to whether they get into it either way ~
Sandra Dodd: Jacquie, you're not in the chat room. You're talking to us through a window. At the bottom of the screen, click "join the chat."
Robin B.: And without the sighing that some parents do when kids do what they prefer to do.
Sandra Dodd: (People on phones or something, where is "join"?)
AlexP: OH I see you did write that Sandra! I only saw the Print , duh me!
Amber: I keep hearing about leaving things in bathrooms - ours are so small! - I started looking into making something to hang on the door so that I could have a spot to strew books and magazines
cat: i just got off my phone in order to type in here - i oculdn't find 'join chat' on my phone so now i am on my computor
Sandra Dodd: -=-I started looking into making something to hang on the door so that I could have a spot to strew books and magazines-=-
Sandra Dodd: NO!
Sandra Dodd: I mean "but wait!"
Chelsea: Sometimes I put new apps that I think Finn would like on his ipad.
AlexP: The join in on phones or tablets is the same in my experience
Robin B.: That's why some people say that strewing is manipulative. When a parent does it for reasons other than "this is cool."
Sandra Dodd: Having books in the bathroom can be a good thing.
Sandra Dodd: A great thing.
Robin B.: Love books in the bathroom! Sandra has some good ones!
Sandra Dodd: But if you're going to hang something on the door in a small bathroom, how about a map or a humorous chart or something
MaryinCO joined the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: I have posters I used to switch out from time to time. One was roman coins and roman emperors.
Sylvia Woodman: What about finding cool things for the Netflix queue? I did that a lot when the kids were little.
Amber: ah
Sandra Dodd: I should find that and give it to Marty. He's listening to a podcast on the history of Rome, on his way to and from his college classes.
Sandra Dodd: He has looked at it before, but he knows lots more now.
Sandra Dodd: It will look different.
Sandra Dodd: If new unschoolers focus on books and magazines, it can keep them from finding learning that happens in the absence of printed-word-intended-to-teach.
Sylvia Woodman: When I was growing up my best friend's family essentially "wall papered" their bathroom with cut out comics from the newspaper and the New Yorker magazine. There was a whole education to be had in that small room!
cat: so what is the difference between setting up an activity for the children to do (like putting out clay for instance) and strewing?
Robin B.: I send links to interesting stuff to my daughter on FB (private message).
Sandra Dodd: Clay is a crafts project. I wouldn't put out something that involves other people, or a mess.
Sandra Dodd: Cat, have you read here? http://sandradodd.com/strewing ?
Sandra Dodd: If not, please do, later.
cat: not for a whlie
Robin B.: I don't even know if she's looked at it unless she tells me. And sometimes, she doesn't tell me. The learning (and the interest) is within the learner.
JacquieHarakis left this message 6 days ago:
I think it can take years for the children to get into stuff we strew. My 5yo is only now really playing with the toddler vtech computer toy that was given to us when he was less than a year old. Only now can he understand the games, and also the numbers and letters.
AlexP: My sister sent me a print of the Magna Carta. My son took it to his room!
Sandra Dodd: Some of our most successful items have been toys or objects for playing with (sometimes not purely a toy) like pattern blocks castle blocks magnets (or some new magnet toy where something swings or moves) a prism odd little crafts things with some tactile element people will just HAVE to pick up and mess with (fuzzy, furry, slippery, gummy...) printouts of good cartoons or little articles or humor lists (generally taped inside the bathroom or left on the counter there, or on the dining table) new foods, snacky stuff, in a bowl, out interesting rocks, rinsed, in a bowl, on the table
Cat joined the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: A list (easier to read as formatted on the strewing page) is quoted above)
Amber: I'm guessing someone somewhere would say that a poster on roman coins and emperors feels/seems really "schoolish" - but I'm also guessing that with enough deschooling, there's no need to fear posters like that
Sandra Dodd: Jacquie, are you on a phone?
JacquieHarakis left this message 6 days ago:
But yeah, I really do not go out of my way to strew, because I find when he is interested in stuff, he really gets into it, and I play catch up.
cat: hi Jacquie i just went back to my phone to see why you can only leave a message - i see now i oculd have clicked on JON CHAT on the right side and then you get a proper place to write inside the chat!
Sandra Dodd: Catching up with an existing interest isn't the same as strewing.
JacquieHarakis left this message 6 days ago:
I'm on a laptop Sandra
Sandra Dodd: Then join the chat
JacquieHarakis joined the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: So you will be posting directly instead of leaving us a message.
JacquieHarakis: Oh, just joined chat - oops!
Sandra Dodd: Better.
Chelsea: Tada! Now you're really here.
AlexP: Magnifying lenses are awesoe! My kids would find them and go on exploratory fun
Robin B.: I brought new-to-us flowers from our garden (hyacinths) in and put them in a vase. Sometimes, it's connection kids make. Senna looked at them and said "Oh, they remind me of the bluebells at park day!" We talked about the bluebells and how the flowers looked like they could be related somehow and it brought back sweet memories.
Robin B.: "Park day" was when she was 6 or so. She's 21, now.
Sandra Dodd: I think parents shouldn't be going out of their way to strew.
Sandra Dodd: I think it should be a natural part of living a life of curiosity and wonder.
Robin B.: Yes!
Marta Venturini: So sweet Robin.
JacquieHarakis: Yes Sandra, much better! And yes, catching up and learning together is not strewing. I meant to say, I feel no need to 'actively strew', if that makes any sense
Amber: But if a parent feels like their natural curiosity and wonder needs some jump-starting? maybe strewing might feel like they're going out of their way? until it becomes more second nature?
Sandra Dodd: It shouldn't be difficult to rearrange things a bit or bring something in from outside, or from your own junk drawer, old jewelry box, souvenirs.
AlexP: Yes!!! Parents going out of their way has some sort of expectation that they kids wll pick it up or even look at what is being strewed
Sandra Dodd: Jacquie, I don't want to have your suggestion that it's not important, that it would be "going out of your way," to cancel out my being here for two hours.
Sandra Dodd: We're here to encourage people to do something, not to say "good idea" about NOT doing it.
AlexP: is that even a word? Srewed
Sylvia Woodman: OK I have to go! One of the local restaurants is giving away free milkshakes today so we are off to try some new flavors! Thanks for the lovely chat!
Sylvia Woodman left the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: STREWING is the topic! Think of misconceptions or problems with strewing. If we can see what can go wrong, we can avoid that and only strew the good and happy way! Think of ways to describe it to newer unschoolers to help them avoid confusion.
Robin B.: "Actively strew" to me implies a purpose beyond sharing your wonder and curiosity.
Sandra Dodd: That was the description that subscribers should have gotten by e-mail.
JacquieHarakis: But, I do get stuff I think will catch his interest, and show him. Sometimes he's into them, sometimes not. And some, I get for me to do and that attracts him
Sandra Dodd: I want to get to that second question.
Sandra Dodd: If you leave that stuff out where he might discover it, then it's strewing.
Sandra Dodd: If you don't think strewing is a good idea or worth doing, I'm not going to check your house or write you up. If you're doing it, cool.
If you're doing it, cool.Sandra Dodd: But ONLY bringing things the child is already interested in is supporting an interest, rather than creating a rich environment of easy discovery.
Sandra Dodd: Parents should do both of those things (and more).
JacquieHarakis: I usually show him and invite him.
AlexP: yes! Bringing stuff you think your child will particularly like and giving it to him is not the same as picking up a bird nest and putting in the kitchen table because you found it wonderful and maybe someone else will, maybe not.
Sandra Dodd: Showing and inviting cancels the strewing. So good. That's an example of a misconception about strewing.
Sandra Dodd: I get to say that, because I use the term first.
Chelsea: Living a life of curiosity and wonder, and having the kind of relationship with someone where you know them well and want to give them the opportunity to see something super cool. Like when my husband leaves links and gifs on my facebook wall, that's similar to strewing. I guess if your kids have facebook leaving them a link could be a form of strewing.
JacquieHarakis: Aha. Hmmm...
Sandra Dodd: And though I've been trying to explain it for years, apparently it's not easy to understand.
AlexP: I only know because I read you page and have read discussions through the years on it!
Chelsea: Or would it need to be on your own wall so they might happen across it in their feed but it's not really directed at them?
Sandra Dodd: Don't look for so many rules. :_)
Sandra Dodd: Sharing things on facebook is sharing things on facebook. If you do it with adult friends or relatives, you could do it with anybody, right?
JacquieHarakis: So, a successful strew is one the child actually discovers?
Sandra Dodd: I'm about to send a friend a book by mail. That's not "strewing." That's a gift.
JacquieHarakis: And takes interest in?
Sandra Dodd: If I say "yes," Jacquie, I'm agreeing to the use of "a successful strew."
Sandra Dodd: Leaving something out because it's interesting is strewing.
Sandra Dodd: It's Successful because you left it out.
Sandra Dodd: Not because someone picked it up.
JacquieHarakis: Okay, I see.
AlexP: yes
Sandra Dodd: it's cool if they do, but unless you're also cool if they don't, then it was a lesson with an opportunity to fail.
Sandra Dodd: People can (should!) buy their kids gifts, too, and play games with them, and bring things home for them that they're sure to like and give them to them!
Amber: monkey platters as a way to strew new foods?
JacquieHarakis: In that case, then I do strew quite a bit.
Sandra Dodd: All of that is sweet, good, supportive, helpful. But it's not strewing.
Sandra Dodd: I don't know what "in that case" referred to, Jacquie.
Amber: or maybe, instead, eating a new food without offering it to the child too?
Sandra Dodd: Same thing, Amber. I don't want to say "yes" because I don't think it's strewing to offer food to a person.
Sandra Dodd: having an odd squash or fruit on the counter (whether or not it's eaten later) might be.
JacquieHarakis: *Creating a rich environment of easy discovery*
Sandra Dodd: Strewing is part of that.
Sandra Dodd: All of that is not strewing.
Sandra Dodd: But yes.
JacquieHarakis: I try. I could d better.
Sandra Dodd: That's the idea.
JacquieHarakis: Tonight, I'll read up on strewing again. Been a while.
Sandra Dodd: Arranging life so that there is newness to be discovered by them, so that they have the joy of surprise. You might get to hear what they first say or see what they do. They might ask you questions. They might not.
Sandra Dodd: They might not say a word, but six months later see another thing kind of like it, and make a connection.
Sandra Dodd: The enrichment of life and their environment should be done whether you have evidence that they saw the things or not. Switch them out after a few days or a week.
Sandra Dodd: Don't make your environment so stark that there's nothing to see, or so jumbled that it turns invisible, or so static that it turns to background, wallpaper and is ignored.
Sandra Dodd: Having Netflix and youtube available to kids is a resource and an enrichment. Helping them find shows they might like is great. Sharing something you find is wonderful.
Sandra Dodd: Not strewing.
Sandra Dodd: But providing them with lots of input and opportunities!
cat: thanks for the check-in, re-alignment and re-definition on strewing! will read a bit more on the main site too. this was important for me: Arranging life so that there is newness to be discovered by them, so that they have the joy of surprise . . . i'll think about that instead of the worrying that woke me up
JacquieHarakis: Ah. Was just going to ask about netflix and youtube.
Sandra Dodd: Recently Keith and I took Kirby's fiancee's six year old (she's seven now, but was six that day) out to breakfast.
JacquieHarakis: Apps on devices. Strewing?
Sandra Dodd: In the music in the restaurant, they played "I Want you Back" by the Jackson 5. She's familiar with the album Thriller, because it's in my van. They used the song Thriller in a PE class she took when she was five.
Robin B.: Yes, I should be clear about the FB messages. It's me sharing what generally I think my daughter already likes or might like - it's being supportive of her interests.
Sandra Dodd: So I mentioned that it was Michael Jackson singing, when he was a boy. As we were leaving, I pulled up a video of them performing it on TV and handed it to her.
Sandra Dodd: She said that thing that used to be joked about, but she was born after Michael Jackson died (or about that time).
Sandra Dodd: She said "Michael Jackson was Black??"
Sandra Dodd: But that led, later, to looking up Angela Davis, for a view of a more impressive Afro, and talking about hair curlers for straight-haired people, and straighteners, and about the 1960's moving toward acceptance of what's natural, in appearance.
Sandra Dodd: And plastic surgery, a bit.
Sandra Dodd: And vitiligo (which a friend of mine has, and which is genetically common in some of the Pueblo Indians here, but I didn't tell her all that or use the term).
Sandra Dodd: MAYBE: JacquieHarakis: Apps on devices. Strewing?
Sandra Dodd: Are you going to play with it, too? Or is it planted for someone to fail to find?
JacquieHarakis: My son heard a youtuber mention Michael Jackson today, asked if he exists in real life. I showed him the Thriller video, he was not very interested.
Sandra Dodd: I've downloaded games I thought my husband would like. Our iPads are linked so that what's downloaded goes to both.
Sandra Dodd: He finds them and tries them.
Sandra Dodd: There are better videos than Thriller for those new to Michael Jackson stuff. Billie Jean. Black or White.
Chelsea: I said up there somewhere that I sometimes put apps on Finn's ipad that I think he would like. He does find and play them, generally.
JacquieHarakis: I tend to play with them.
Sandra Dodd: The face morphing is good.
Sandra Dodd: Strewing is one of many things.
Serah: everything links together
Serah: cool story, Sandra!
Sandra Dodd: But not strewing.
JacquieHarakis: Generally, his interest is piqued when he sees us doing stuff,
Sandra Dodd: Thanks, Serah. That was my attempted point.
Serah: no, i was going to say that
Sandra Dodd: We were always following those trails with my kids, and building on the music and humor of the week. Still, but now it's by messages and phone.
Sandra Dodd: We provide more clues and connections, humor, and resources, even though they're grown, and they send us stuff too. Clues, links, images, reminders.
Serah: yes, we do that too. It happens naturally, i think the more connected we are to our kids.
antjeB joined the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: Yes. Sometimes there would be what seemed like marathons of connections and humorous references. Then for a while it might be quieter, and more separate, and then another funny, busy season of sparking connections would come along.
Chelsea: Hey Antje! <3 p="">
cat: yes i am thinking about these ebbs and flows. i forget sometimes that things come in waves, seasons . . .
Sandra Dodd: After we all saw The Book of Mormon together, there were LOTS of jokes and references for a while to things in the show, and around it, and to things that happened that day. Now it has faded some, but the possitility is still there.
Sandra Dodd: Right. It will come back around if the mom remembers to keep the soil clean and fertile.
antjeB: hi Chelsea, hi guys!! sorry I'm late, just saw this.
Sandra Dodd: Space. Time. Acceptance and joy. Joy is crucial.
AlexP: sounds like here. And specially with my son that likes humorous t
Sandra Dodd: Strewing is cancelled out by stress, worry, resentment—any negativity.
AlexP: connections
JacquieHarakis: Hi Antje.
Sandra Dodd: It should be done with hope, and joy, and wonder, and appreciation of beauty, on the part of the mo.
Sandra Dodd: mom
Serah: and without any expectations
Sandra Dodd: Right. Not hope that it will be discovered. Hope of happiness and beauty in the house (or curiosity).
AlexP: So strewig is part of creating this wonderfuly rich learning enviroment where kids can discover new things.
Sandra Dodd: Strewing can help with deschooling, which is why I say no to books, when newer unschoolers say they go to the library and strew books about things their kids are interested in.
Sandra Dodd: That's just half a step from a school library.
Sandra Dodd: They need to step AWAY from the school, past the fence, past the curb, past the shadow of the school. Way away.
Sandra Dodd: When unschooling is working solidly and the mom *knows*—really knows, not just recites the words—that kids can and do and will learn without being taught, without depending on books (or how-to videos, or wikipedia) for information—THEN she can put some books in the bathroom.
Marta Venturini:
Sandra Dodd: Too many books too early get between a parent and her own learning about learning.
cat: ANY negativity! wow . . . that's something to comtemplate . . .
AlexP: So strewing is, on top of bringing in things your children may like, or suporting their interests, part of creating this environement. DOne without expectations or pressure.
Sandra Dodd: Cat was referring to this, I think: "Strewing is cancelled out by stress, worry, resentment—any negativity."
Sandra Dodd: My statement, above.
Sandra Dodd: No family needs added stress. Unschooling won't be helped by a mom who's going to have a fit if the kids don't pick up what she strews, or even if she's going to have a personal jealous reaction as though she's been ignored or rejected, if she puts out a bowl of rocks and they just sit there.
Sandra Dodd: You know what's prettier than a bowl of rocks!?
Sandra Dodd: A bowl of WET rocks.
Sandra Dodd: Be more thoughtful, strewing moms.
AlexP: Negativity by a parent imensely hinders unschooling and a negative environment will preclude unschooling from flourishing
Amber:
Sandra Dodd: Find a better location. bring something more interesting.
Sandra Dodd: http://sandradodd.com/negativity
Sandra Dodd: Five minutes!
Sandra Dodd: Other than the much-repeated "without attachment to outcome," what should we say to help keep future new unschoolers from being confused about what strewing is, what it's good for?
cat: i'd better go and get some sleep so i can be positive tomorrow thanks for the company and the inspirations - (i'll read the link first)
thanks for the company and the inspirations - (i'll read the link first)AlexP: strewig
Sandra Dodd: Thanks for being here.
Sandra Dodd: When people want to leave the room, if you type /bye on a line by itself, the room will announce your departure.
Sandra Dodd left the chat 6 days ago
antjeB joined the chat 6 days ago
Marta Venturini: A lot of what's been said here today has helped me understand strewing better, besides the "without attachment to outcome" part.
Sandra Dodd joined the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: Like that.
AlexP: strewing is making something the parent find interesting for the children to discover at home?
Jill Parmer: Find cool stuff. Set it down. Walk away.
Sandra Dodd: Yeah, I like that, Alex and Jill.
Sandra Dodd: Magnets.
Sandra Dodd: Magnifying glass.
Sandra Dodd: Maggots.
Sandra Dodd: That's just the stuff that starts with mag...!
AlexP: making something available or put out in the open for the child to discover
JacquieHarakis: I'm taking away, 'rich environment, easy discovery, creativity'
Serah: i agree Marta
Sandra Dodd: Maybe magazines.
cat: that'll need more time to read properly! tomorrow!
cat: bye
Robin B.: Be curious and wondering, yourself.
Marta Venturini: Especially the part about not pointing out that there's something new to be seen.
Sandra Dodd: And positive, and appreciative.
JacquieHarakis: thank you, enjoyed my first chat!
Sandra Dodd: Yes. Put it down quietly. "Walk away," as Jill says. Don't hover with the camera.
Marta Venturini: I think that part wasn't clear for me yet.
Marta Venturini: Exactly.
AlexP: feathers, shells ( Includind insect shells), bones, pins, old tools
Sandra Dodd: Next week: Attachment/relationship/social-coach How can we help children nagivate social situations?
Jill Parmer: Cool. Thanks Sandra, and all.
Marta Venturini: Thank you Sandra!
Marta Venturini: See you all next week. Great chat!
Sandra Dodd: Lots of people this time. Thank you all!!
Marta Venturini: 
Jill Parmer left the chat 6 days ago
AlexP: this was a very good chat Sandra. Great way to clarify so many misconceptions about strewing! Thank you
Serah: thanks!
antjeB: oh i need that one! looking forward to that!
Sandra Dodd: "Nagivate"? I like that word, but I meant "navigate."
Sandra Dodd: I probably cut and pasted it from Alex, the most creative speller ever.
Sandra Dodd: Thanks, Alex.
Chelsea: I love this "Don't make your environment so stark that there's nothing to see, or so jumbled that it turns invisible, or so static that it turns to background, wallpaper and is ignored."
Sandra Dodd: Thank you, Chelsea!
Chelsea: Good chat, thanks so much!
Sandra Dodd: When i put the chat notes up, I'll tell people who are in a hurry to skip to the bottom for a "Best parts" summary.
Amber: I was caught up on the idea of how to strew an experience - so this chat definitely cleared that up for me.
AlexP: specially now that I am typing without any spellcheck and in this tiny keyboard . Not a good typer anyways and just simply not a great speller
AlexP: if you keep hanging out with me ... my creative spelling maybe rubbing off on you
antjeB left the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: Amber, if you take kids to a new park knowing there are interesting things there, but you don't direct their play, or give them a tour, that's a similar thing. It's giving them a chance to discover something excitedly and to ask about it, or figure it out, without you TELLING them "we came here because there is a kid-tunnel I want you to see. Come and look!""
AlexP: Goodbye and thanks!
Sandra Dodd: Let them find some things. Don't expect them to find everything, though.
Serah left the chat 6 days ago
Sandra Dodd: Next week, see ya!
Sandra Dodd left the chat 6 days ago
Chelsea left the chat 6 days ago
Amber: Thank you Sandra, thank you everyone!! Until next time!
